Mr Browning and comrades
The love besotted teenager gazed at the man many would describe as her secret lover as he swept around the small kitchen, collecting ingredients for what was to be their last meal of the day in union. He seemed to float effortlessly around the room, whatever coloured, edible object in his view becoming one with his grasp and falling into the bowl. 
Her look of awe did not seem to change as he bent over the counter to kiss her nose, the light of dusk only furthering his admirable beauty. “What was that for?” she asked, her tone as cheery as she could muster to disguise the giggle that was penetrating her lungs. “So I can’t kiss my future wife then?” he replied, one eyebrow pointed high in the air.
The weary look she gave him said otherwise. Kourtney loathed the moments when Demetri would speak about their future as though they were a powerhouse couple that could last a lifetime. While it was a well known fact in their campus that they’d had a 3 years and counting relationship, she never quite liked the thought of that ‘long term commitment called marriage’. It could always end in divorce or worse like some unfortunate souls she knew.
Demetri couldn’t help but notice the bits of lint from Kourtney’s jumper had formed a mountain worthy of naming and shaming the Everest. She was thinking. And hard. After a lifetime and a half she finally replied. “Shut up Demetri. It’s not like that… y’know.” She waved her hand in the air dismissively before counting up to ten in her head, Demetri’s usual moment of “So what is it like then?” only a one too familiar scene in her life. Instead he gave a nonchalant shrug. “Whatever. You gonna help me bake this cake Miss Browning?”
A/N: Part 1 is finally alive and breathing! It took me a while to get it out but ah, it feels great to have it done. I also used a different writing style to ‘normal’ and I think I prefer this one. Should I stick to it for the next couple of the parts? I think it has a ‘I am the silent narrator who knows waay better than you do’ vibe which makes me smile - I think it helps ‘get into’ the shoes of whatever character better. But hey that’s just me. 
The pictures were all my partner in crime’s work though so three heck of cheers for her. Oh um, long AN isn’t it? -thelook
Posted by S.B. on July 6, 2010 at 12:08 am
I’m completely fascinated! The characters jump right off the page, including some who are not very sympathetic. The writing is wonderful!! The description fits perfectly without overwhelming the narrative, and I love the text/shot ratio and the length. WONDERFUL START!
Yeah, I like the writing style. It’s different, but it definitely works. And the pictures have a unique style that also really works with the sort of distant narrator.
KEEP GOING!!!
Posted by SunsetHills on July 6, 2010 at 6:26 am
Thank you very much S.B! A big virtual hug to you for your support.
It means a lot.
Posted by Phoenix on July 6, 2010 at 7:57 am
Ohhh, I really enjoyed the different perspectives that you had going on here. It’s definitely unique and gives us a different way of looking at the characters. I like how each person has a distinct voice and the way you opened up each character was awesome!:)
I’m really glad that you kept going with this! And your author’s note wasn’t long at all! I’ve seen longer!:P And I enjoy A/N anyways! Keep it up!
Posted by SunsetHills on July 6, 2010 at 3:18 pm
Yay for different character perspectives! I didn’t actually see it like that ’til it was mentioned so thank you. Oh I couldn’t stop this story even in my sleep. It’s nice giving it a try and if it ends up floppy, whatever – at least it was given a shot. (:
Posted by Qui on July 22, 2010 at 10:02 pm
I enjoyed the different perspectives! I could see the wedding planner in front of me, snapping her head back before looking down at her notebook to mumble “It’s Mellissa”. When I can see it happening in front of me, you have me hooked in. I’d say this writing style worked out well.
Posted by SunsetHills on July 23, 2010 at 9:59 am
I think it worked out too. Thank you for reading Qui. (: